As is my usual excuse, I've been devoting my time to other, more time consuming tasks than writing, so far·ra·go sits on a back burner, barely simmering, with a slimy skin forming on the top....
Well, Shoot!
I worked last week in my chosen career, that of video production guy. I went to Omaha on Sunday July 11 for two nights. It was kind of weird doing that after not having done it for nearly a full year. Some things came to me like I had last done them yesterday, while others took some thought. Most frustrating was my intermittent inability to find certain non-essential-yet-still-crucial little buttons on the camera. But, in all, it was like getting on a bike again. I walked away kinda sweaty with a sore ass.
Don't go there.
P90Xtasy? Uh, no....
I've completed week number three of twelve in the P90X Extreme Home Fitness program. I'm still alive. I think my belly is slimming down a bit, but it's hard to tell. My pants are loose again. I think that's a good sign. Feel free to follow my progress, bitching, and moaning at my P90X blog, P90Xperiment
My Eye Queue
I've been squeezing in a few movies lately, chipping away slowly at my Netflix queue. Recent movies have been The Simpsons Movie, which I swear I had never seen before, but so much of it was familiar I doubt myself (but when did I see it?!); Million Dollar Baby; Ratatouille; and, just today, 3:10 to Yuma.
Million Dollar Baby
I have always taken Clint Eastwood — as a director — with a grain of salt. I come under the gun (to make a pun) with friends and film nuts alike whenever I give them my opinion of Eastwood's Unforgiven which was hailed as an instant classic in an era when the Western is all but dead. I saw it as pointless, a violent soapbox diatribe claiming to be against violence. I must be the only one.
So it was with a similar attitude that I watched my Blu-Ray player swallow the Million Dollar Baby disc. It was a likeable story about a determined young woman, played by Hillary Swank, whose dream was only to be trained as a fighter by her vision of the greatest trainer that ever lived, the old, worn-out boxing trainer portrayed by Eastwood, who thinks a woman training in his gym is bad for business. Of course, he's finally convinced, thanks to her tenacity, to take her on. Of course, he's dealing with the emotional loss of his daughter, estranged from him years ago and who refuses to communicate with him, and he feels a paternal tug toward this young woman who is otherwise alone.
So I expected a boxing movie, only with a woman in the ring kicking ass and making her way to the champeenship, which she of course wins.
Not.
This movie hits you with a surprise haymaker from your blind side, and redefines "unpredictable." I won't spoil it for anyone who has a worse record of movie-going than I do (this film was released in 2005!), But I will say that I'm not supposed to cry like that over a boxing film!
Mr. Eastwood, I bow to you and your directing prowess, and I give your film four Netflix stars. Million Dollar Baby deserves all the Academy Awards it received (Best Director, Best Picture, Best Supporting Actor (Morgan Freeman), and Best Actress (Swank)).
Unforgiven still blows, though. Thanks.
Ratatouille
Set aside the ridiculous proposition that a rat could be a culinary genius, communicating to an inept human the movements necessary to create impossibly delicious dishes. Okay... done?
This film was FANTASTIC! With each progression of digitally animated storytelling, Pixar Studios further hones the craft and sets the new standard for it. The detail in Ratatouille is mind-boggling, both in attention to character movement, as well as scenic background elements. There are several scenes of Paris exteriors that I had to pause the film to study, almost convinced that the background was at best a mix of actual photos/film of Paris street scenes. But no. It's all art work of unbelievable meticulousness and realism.
And the story. Aside from its preposterous premise (but how else to get the kids in the theater seats?), the story was sweet, dealing with relationships at both the human level and the rat, through conflict and motives, needs and desires. And the best part? No musical numbers! There's a good bit of slapstick — necessary for the ADHD set — and a nice balance of shtick and witty banter for the parents they dragged with them. There's also a bit of a surprise, as the usual happy ending isn't quite what you expect it to be. Great vocalizations carry the story comfortably, despite an inexplicable inconsistency of French accents (some have them, some don't; none of the rats do).
I thoroughly enjoyed Ratatouille, laughing out loud many times while watching it. If you like animated films, I highly recommend this one. If you don't like animated films, then screw you. Go watch Million Dollar Baby again.
3:10 to Yuma (spoiler alert!!)
Based on a 1957 film of the same title, and an Elmore Leonard short story, it's about a poor rancher who agrees to house a captured gang leader, and then assist with transporting him on a two-day ride to the town of Contention in order to put the prisoner on a train to Yuma.
Starring Russell Crowe and Christian Bale, this film is billed as a psychological drama against an Old West backdrop, but as such it falls short. This is an action-adventure film, with very little suspense or psychological intrigue, if any. If it doesn't act like a duck, don't call it a duck.
The film certainly lives up to its correctly identified genre, but that's about it. If you like shoot-em-ups with lots of exploding blood-packs and guys falling off horses, then you won't be disappointed. If you want a story that makes sense, look elsewhere. Crowe is cast as the fearsome bad guy, Ben Wade, who earns his gang's respect through terror and swift repercussions for less than exceptional work. He has made his fortune by repeatedly robbing the stagecoach that carries the railroad's payroll, haplessly guarded by Pinkerton's Security Services. Bale portrays the rancher, Dan Evans, who the land-hungry railroad agent has on the ropes by damming up a creek that would otherwise bring water to his cattle and his grassland.
Evans facilitates Wade's capture by stalling him in a saloon while the law and railroad men move in on him, and then he accepts their offer of money if he'll assist them in first housing Wade and then in transporting him to the nearest railroad town, a couple days' ride away.
Wade then commences a confusing dance of murdering some of his escorts while submitting to others. By the end, it's just Wade, Evans, Evans's son, and the weasely railroad agent waiting nervously in the town of Contention for the train to Yuma to arrive, as Wade's ruthless gang descend on the town to free him. Inexplicably, Wade assists Evans in getting him to the train through the gauntlet of lead sprayed around the town by Wade's men, despite several opportunities to either kill Evans or simply escape. And does Evans really do all this because his boy thinks he's a wuss? Apparently so. And all for naught, as Evans is finally gunned down by Wade's men just as Wade willingly gets into the cell-car of the train. And Wade's show of gratitude to his men? He kills them all. And then he gets back on the train to go to jail.
WTF?
Maybe Elmore Leonard's 4500 word short story explains it better. Maybe the original 1957 film does a better job of outlining why Wade doesn't kill Evans with the many opportunities the 2007 film offers him.
Maybe, if you've been wanting to see this film after missing its theatrical release (like I did), you'll just change your mind. The Simpsons Movie is more intellectually gratifying.
°
Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
The Dream Machine
Monday night I watched the next Netflix selection in my queue, Two Weeks Notice, starring Hugh Grant and Sandra Bullock.
Yeah, I watched a chick-flick. Alone. You got a problem widdat?
It was sweet, funny, sexy, formulaic and predictable. I doubt the Roger Eberts, Leonard Maltins, and the A.O. Scotts of the nation gave this 2002 film very high marks, but the movie knows where your buttons are and when to push them.
As it finished I realized that this was the same romantic comedy I had ever seen starring either of the two stars. Grant played the same charming, womanizing, wealthy cad he seems to always play, who — somewhere in the middle of the film — realizes that he's in love with the same clumsy, intelligent, understatedly-pretty-until-the-"a-ha!"-moment, opinionated-but-lonely, pain-in-the-ass woman, that Sandra Bullock seems to always play.
I've always been one to scoff at people who won't go see a movie because they don't like a particular actor. What difference does it make, I've argued, he/she is portraying a character, not him/herself! And, at some levels I know I'm right. Most film actors must be able to get out of that wet paper bag if they're going to carry that 70-million-dollar picture.
But Sunday evening — very briefly — I saw the world more as it is than as I think it should be. Maybe it was too much V8 and chocolate, I don't know. But as I felt my buttons being pushed in the right order at the right time, it occurred to me that these two stars didn't have to break out of anything in this movie. Most of the English-speaking, movie-going world like Hugh Grant — certainly the women, anyway — and they want him to be the sexy, naughty boy who gets hooked by the klutzy, plain girl. They like Sandra Bullock as that klutz who wins the guy over without even trying, and who is filmed with softer and softer focus throughout the film to accentuate the beauty that her leading man is supposedly seeing — not to mention the stalwart men's men who bravely accompany their girlfriends and wives to these films. You have to give them something to look at between all the girl-talk and winsome expressions.
This is what we want as a collective audience. We men want to identify with the charismatic playboy who finds the diamond in the rough. Women want to identify with the smart, sassy, everyday girl with one killer outfit that knocks the playboy off his horse. Hugh Grant and Sandra Bullock are repeatedly given these roles because we're comfortable with their faces and with their schtik, and we like how they make us feel at the end when they finally kiss.
But, oh, does that swelling-music, circling camera, fuzzy-focus love ever truly happen in the real world? I think not. I believe it's a myth perpetuated by the Hollywood dream machine as "the hope."
And now I sorta have a thing for Sandra Bullock.
°
Yeah, I watched a chick-flick. Alone. You got a problem widdat?
It was sweet, funny, sexy, formulaic and predictable. I doubt the Roger Eberts, Leonard Maltins, and the A.O. Scotts of the nation gave this 2002 film very high marks, but the movie knows where your buttons are and when to push them.
As it finished I realized that this was the same romantic comedy I had ever seen starring either of the two stars. Grant played the same charming, womanizing, wealthy cad he seems to always play, who — somewhere in the middle of the film — realizes that he's in love with the same clumsy, intelligent, understatedly-pretty-until-the-"a-ha!"-moment, opinionated-but-lonely, pain-in-the-ass woman, that Sandra Bullock seems to always play.
I've always been one to scoff at people who won't go see a movie because they don't like a particular actor. What difference does it make, I've argued, he/she is portraying a character, not him/herself! And, at some levels I know I'm right. Most film actors must be able to get out of that wet paper bag if they're going to carry that 70-million-dollar picture.
But Sunday evening — very briefly — I saw the world more as it is than as I think it should be. Maybe it was too much V8 and chocolate, I don't know. But as I felt my buttons being pushed in the right order at the right time, it occurred to me that these two stars didn't have to break out of anything in this movie. Most of the English-speaking, movie-going world like Hugh Grant — certainly the women, anyway — and they want him to be the sexy, naughty boy who gets hooked by the klutzy, plain girl. They like Sandra Bullock as that klutz who wins the guy over without even trying, and who is filmed with softer and softer focus throughout the film to accentuate the beauty that her leading man is supposedly seeing — not to mention the stalwart men's men who bravely accompany their girlfriends and wives to these films. You have to give them something to look at between all the girl-talk and winsome expressions.
This is what we want as a collective audience. We men want to identify with the charismatic playboy who finds the diamond in the rough. Women want to identify with the smart, sassy, everyday girl with one killer outfit that knocks the playboy off his horse. Hugh Grant and Sandra Bullock are repeatedly given these roles because we're comfortable with their faces and with their schtik, and we like how they make us feel at the end when they finally kiss.
But, oh, does that swelling-music, circling camera, fuzzy-focus love ever truly happen in the real world? I think not. I believe it's a myth perpetuated by the Hollywood dream machine as "the hope."
And now I sorta have a thing for Sandra Bullock.
°
Tuesday, November 06, 2007
Movie Meme
It’s been a while since anybody’s tagged me, but tagged I am – this time by Professor. This one was tough for me because I can probably count on two hands the number of movies I’ve watched in the last two years. I know there are movies that have really reached me throughout my life, but I’ll be damned if I can remember the best ones. Well, here goes, and remember to pop on over to check out what Professor has to say at her blog.
Popcorn or Candy?
Popcorn. Candy you can buy anywhere, for lots cheaper. Popcorn anywhere other than the theater you have to make, or nuke, or buy cold with fake “butter flavor” powder on it, which just doesn’t get the popcorn all marvelously soggy four to twenty hours later when your lips are no longer numb from the salt and you’re ready for more snackin’!
Name a movie you’ve been meaning to see forever.
Deep Thro… no, wait… American Pie. Everyone I’ve spoken to who’s seen that flick has told me I’m an idiot for not having seen it…even people over the age of 15 have told me this. Some have told me I'm an idiot without even mentioning a movie…. Hmmmm….
Steal one costume from a movie for your wardrobe.
I guess it would have to be the fedora and leather jacket Harrison Ford wore in the Indiana Jones films, because I already have the gingham dress and the ruby slippers from The Wizar... oops. Next Question?
Your favorite film franchise is…
Jeez, I don’t know. I guess I’d have to go with the Star Wars saga, though I’d have to say that the Bourne films and the Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen movies are close behind.*
Invite five movie characters over for dinner. Who are they? Why’d you invite them? What do you feed them?
1) Mary Hatch because she’s so sweet and pretty and, well, that phone call with George Bailey and Sam Wainright is the hottest love scene shot from the shoulders up EVER!
2) Tia Russell, because I finally saw that movie a few weeks ago after it had been out only 17 years(!) and I absolutely fell in love with her. Please disregard the whole she-was-only-17-when-she-made-the-movie thing… she’s staying after dinner is over and everyone else has left…except Mary Hatch!
3) Frank Bullitt because after dinner he’s gonna let me take his 1968 Ford Mustang Fastback for one helluva spin …with Tia Russell and Mary Hatch! And then he's leaving!
4) Willy Wonka, because I want to see how long it takes before Frank Bullitt punches his lights out.
5) Professor Julius Kelp/Buddy Love, and I want him to bring his potion along with him and take it so we can all see his transformation. Also, I want him to bring enough potion for all of us just so we can see what each of us becomes after taking it.
I’m taking everyone to White Castle because I know everybody will like it (except, maybe, Tia Russell, but she and I will discuss that after dinner ;D ). Besides, if I cook for everyone, someone’ll be dead before morning.
What is the appropriate punishment for people who answer cell phones in the movie theater?
Bean him/her/them repeatedly in the back of the head with Ju-Ju-Bees or Sno-Caps (keeping the popcorn in my bucket where it belongs (see paragraph above).
Choose a female bodyguard:
Hmmm. “Large Marge”? Or Owen’s momma? Or Angelina Jolie? Oh, what I could do with those lips! I’m gonna have to go with Angelina Jolie on this one, and I’ll be a most inappropriate employer!
What’s the scariest thing you’ve ever seen in a movie?
Stephen Hawking.
Your favorite genre (excluding “comedy” and “drama” ):
Action-Adventure
You are given the power to greenlight movies at a major studio for one year.
A few of… ah, hell! ALL of my own story ideas are developed, completed and released. Tom Hanks is doing silly comedy again. Drew Barrymore, Tom Cruise and Vin Diesel (to name a few) are out of work, as they should be. The formula for action-adventure is thrown out the window and re-invented. The studio loses a TON of money, and I’m run out of town on a rail. But I have fun while it lasts, and why not? It’s all about me, right?
Bonnie or Clyde?
Are we talking the real Bonnie, or as played by Faye Dunaway? Point’s moot, ‘cause I ain’t taking Clyde under any circumstances.
***---***---***---***---***---***
Okay, if you're reading this, you're tagged...unless you're Professor or one of the others she tagged with this meme. Git writin'!
*I’m only kidding. I only meant Mary Kate and Ashley.
Popcorn or Candy?
Popcorn. Candy you can buy anywhere, for lots cheaper. Popcorn anywhere other than the theater you have to make, or nuke, or buy cold with fake “butter flavor” powder on it, which just doesn’t get the popcorn all marvelously soggy four to twenty hours later when your lips are no longer numb from the salt and you’re ready for more snackin’!
Name a movie you’ve been meaning to see forever.
Deep Thro… no, wait… American Pie. Everyone I’ve spoken to who’s seen that flick has told me I’m an idiot for not having seen it…even people over the age of 15 have told me this. Some have told me I'm an idiot without even mentioning a movie…. Hmmmm….
Steal one costume from a movie for your wardrobe.
I guess it would have to be the fedora and leather jacket Harrison Ford wore in the Indiana Jones films, because I already have the gingham dress and the ruby slippers from The Wizar... oops. Next Question?
Your favorite film franchise is…
Jeez, I don’t know. I guess I’d have to go with the Star Wars saga, though I’d have to say that the Bourne films and the Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen movies are close behind.*
Invite five movie characters over for dinner. Who are they? Why’d you invite them? What do you feed them?
1) Mary Hatch because she’s so sweet and pretty and, well, that phone call with George Bailey and Sam Wainright is the hottest love scene shot from the shoulders up EVER!
2) Tia Russell, because I finally saw that movie a few weeks ago after it had been out only 17 years(!) and I absolutely fell in love with her. Please disregard the whole she-was-only-17-when-she-made-the-movie thing… she’s staying after dinner is over and everyone else has left…except Mary Hatch!
3) Frank Bullitt because after dinner he’s gonna let me take his 1968 Ford Mustang Fastback for one helluva spin …with Tia Russell and Mary Hatch! And then he's leaving!
4) Willy Wonka, because I want to see how long it takes before Frank Bullitt punches his lights out.
5) Professor Julius Kelp/Buddy Love, and I want him to bring his potion along with him and take it so we can all see his transformation. Also, I want him to bring enough potion for all of us just so we can see what each of us becomes after taking it.
I’m taking everyone to White Castle because I know everybody will like it (except, maybe, Tia Russell, but she and I will discuss that after dinner ;D ). Besides, if I cook for everyone, someone’ll be dead before morning.
What is the appropriate punishment for people who answer cell phones in the movie theater?
Bean him/her/them repeatedly in the back of the head with Ju-Ju-Bees or Sno-Caps (keeping the popcorn in my bucket where it belongs (see paragraph above).
Choose a female bodyguard:
Hmmm. “Large Marge”? Or Owen’s momma? Or Angelina Jolie? Oh, what I could do with those lips! I’m gonna have to go with Angelina Jolie on this one, and I’ll be a most inappropriate employer!
What’s the scariest thing you’ve ever seen in a movie?
Stephen Hawking.
Your favorite genre (excluding “comedy” and “drama” ):
Action-Adventure
You are given the power to greenlight movies at a major studio for one year.
A few of… ah, hell! ALL of my own story ideas are developed, completed and released. Tom Hanks is doing silly comedy again. Drew Barrymore, Tom Cruise and Vin Diesel (to name a few) are out of work, as they should be. The formula for action-adventure is thrown out the window and re-invented. The studio loses a TON of money, and I’m run out of town on a rail. But I have fun while it lasts, and why not? It’s all about me, right?
Bonnie or Clyde?
Are we talking the real Bonnie, or as played by Faye Dunaway? Point’s moot, ‘cause I ain’t taking Clyde under any circumstances.
***---***---***---***---***---***
Okay, if you're reading this, you're tagged...unless you're Professor or one of the others she tagged with this meme. Git writin'!
*I’m only kidding. I only meant Mary Kate and Ashley.
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