Professor's 'Hood

I bid a final farewell to Great Falls on Tuesday morning, after stopping by the Missouri River Diner to sort of make up for making fun of them in my blog...not like they'll ever see it and be offended, unless commenter David shows and tells them (David, don't!) (Side note: As it turns out, the Missouri River Diner moves into a respectable 2nd Place in the rankings for The Best Corned Beef Hash Breakfast In America!)

I headed east out of Great Falls, intended for Themiddleoffuckingnowhere, Montana, for a visit with Professor.


Not quite there... more like Theedgeoffuckingnowhere, with about
a hundred miles left to go.

I arrived in TMOFN around 4:00pm and was greeted with a great big hug by Professor, who then took me on a walking tour of TMOFN. The whole thing took about 10 minutes, including two potty breaks (which reminds me... I'll have to blog about my dime-sized bladder some day). Then we went up to "the café" (which was to become a running theme) where we each dined on one of Montana's many bounties -- a huge, thick slab o' beef! Afterward it was down to the H Bar for drinks and the longest game of pool in the history of people playing with balls.

Wednesday morning we broke fast at the café and then headed further east toward The Marina. About 10 miles down a gravel road we turned off and bounced across a wheat field where Professor's best buddy Wilber was turning up the soil in a big piece of farm equipment. I had only Professor's descriptions of Wilber -- and a couple of photos on her blog -- to go on, and a few mentions by Professor after my arrival that, if I was cause for Professor's slightest doubts or qualms about my staying in her home for a couple of nights, one word to Wilber and I would mysteriously disappear....

But Wilber must have intuited that I'm really a nice guy, and so she kept the pipe wrench in her back pocket. After a few minutes of conversation she proved to be a very warm and kind young lady, and someone I should like to meet again some day. It wasn't until Professor and I were in the car again, bouncing back across the field that I noticed the freshly dug, six-foot long by three-foot wide by six-foot deep hole, mostly obscured by two sagebrush trees....


A nice little visual surprise on the way to the Breaks.

Anyhoo, back onto the gravel road for another 20 miles or so, and we came across another Montana wonder, The Missouri Breaks. The road wound up and down through these natural beauties and it was an effort to keep the car on the road while rubbernecking to see the vistas.




The Missouri Breaks. Every day. But they always fix it over night
in time for the tourists.

We arrived at The Marina, which sits at the edge of The Biggest Freakin' Lake On the Planet Lake, where we picked up lunch for Wilber, who was going to be busy all day out in the fields. We returned to the wheat fields and bounced back across to where she was. I noticed that the hole had been filled in.... We sat on the ground and talked while Wilber ate her lunch. For the first time in my life I was witness to girl-talk. No, I don't mean fourth-grade school playground kind of girl-talk. I mean girl-talk! And you know what I learned? It's the exact same as guy-talk, only some of the words are different...and I will not elaborate! It was a very welcoming feeling that they talked as if I was one of the group. Or...were they talking as if I wasn't there....? Hmmm.

Plans were made to meet later at the H Bar for drinks and dinner, and Professor and I returned to TMOFN for lunch, but at the other place to eat in town...not the café. Afterward we had a nice, long chat about all sorts of stuff, to include the price of tea in china, though why it should be different from the price of tea in a plain old mug, we couldn't come to a conclusion.

Wilber showed up and we three darted down to the H Bar. While there I got a good taste of the local drama that Professor occasionally blogs about. It's such a small town that no one's personal business can escape the scrutiny of the locals, and if your business raises even one eyebrow, the gossip races across the town faster than a phone call!

Thursday morning was time for me to hit the road and make my way toward Minnesota, but not before breakfast at the café with Professor again. She is a very warm, gregarious, funny and smart person. She tends to play the ditz in her blog, but don't be fooled... She is one sharp lady! (And she loves visitors! Drop in on her any time! I'll post her phone number and address at the bottom of this post!) Breakfast finished, and another great big hug from her as we said good-bye, and I was on my way. I have until Friday to get to Minnesota, so I didn't kill myself driving for 14 hours. After a leisurely eight hour drive, I rolled into Jamestown, North Dakota, for the night.


The long and... long! ...road through eastern Montana.







North Dakota didn't turn out to be as flat and featureless as I had
expected... at least not the western parts.


And in case anyone ever tries to stump you with the question,
"What's the capital of North Dakota...."

It's 'N.'